Narcissist Love Bombing: What is it and What Are the Signs?

We all know the euphoric feeling you experience when you start dating someone. Being swept off your feet can feel fun, exciting and makes you feel flattered. Narcissist love bombing, however, is a different story. What is it and what are the signs?

This is a kind of technique used by narcissists to manipulate someone into their abusive cycles. This manipulation technique is used to win over your trust and affection so they can exploit you and use you to fuel their ego with narcissistic supply. 

Narcissistic abuse can leave long term effects due to narcissist gaslighting, manipulation and by breaking down your self-esteem. The love bombing cycle is very confusing and following the narcissistic abuse cycle, you can lose your ability to trust others in future friendships and relationships.

So what is love bombing? And what are the signs of love bombing you should look out for? In this article I will explain some of the most common signs of love bombing when dating a narcissist.

If you’re struggling to heal from narcissistic abuse, I warmly welcome you to my Narcissistic Abuse Recovery Program. It’s an easy self-paced online course which you can do at your own pace. My signature program combines scientific and spiritual tools for holistic healing of the body, mind, and spirit.

They flourish you with compliments

We all like to feel beautiful, adored and appreciated. A narcissist knows exactly what you want to hear, so they engage in narcissist love bombing by flourishing you with compliments and constant praise. 

Some narcissist love bombing phrases they might use include:

• ‘’You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen’’
• “I love everything about you.”
• “You are my ideal partner, I’ve never met someone so perfect.”
• “You’re the only person I want to be with.”

Of course, it doesn’t mean that anyone who makes these statements in a relationship is showing signs of love bombing or is a narcissist. It could be that someone is genuinely falling in love with you. Just be aware and check if their behavior is consistent with what they are saying. Learn more about the 5 Red Flags to Look Out For in a Relationship.

They phone you and text you non-stop

You feel overwhelmed and might even find it hard to focus at work or on other things as they text, and message you over social media 24/7. When you first start dating someone, it’s natural that you feel quite engaged and communicate a lot when you’re not together.

However, it could be a sign of love bombing if the communication feels one-sided, disrupts your concentration and starts feeling overwhelming.

They are highly demanding and require your undivided attention

Another sign of love bombing by a narcissist is getting agitated or angry when you don’t give them all your attention. Narcissists are like kids, they need a lot of attention and admiration, which is another reason why they start love bombing you. 

No matter how much time you dedicate for them, it never seems to be enough. You might find yourself bailing on friends to meet the narcissist because he or she can’t stand to be alone. 

Or they might call you and expect you to spend hours speaking with them on the phone even when you are with your friends. Otherwise they might throw a tantrum and make you pay for not giving them the attention they demanded from you.

They rush you into commitment

Another sign of love bombing by a narcissist is pressuring you to rush things and make big plans for the future. They’ll tell you that they want to marry you or suggest moving in together when you’ve just started dating or known each other for a short period of time.

These are only false and a sign of love bombing as they will tell you that they changed their mind soon after. Narcissists are good at making false promises to overwhelm you with emotions so you stop seeing clearly.

They ignore your boundaries

If you try and explain to a narcissist that you want to slow things down, they’ll try to manipulate you to get what they want. A healthy partner who truly cares about you, respects what you’re saying and does not try to overstep your boundaries.

When you show a narcissist that you feel overwhelmed with their narcissistic love bombing, their fragile ego cannot handle it and they feel offended. So they expect you to take it all and accept their overwhelming and intense affection which might feel invasive or suffocating.

They lavish you with gifts

A common sign of love bombing in narcissists involves over-the-top gestures. For example lavishing you with gifts to try to impress you. You might be swept off your feet as this can seem harmless enough. You mistake it for a kind and thoughtful gesture but the motive behind it is to manipulate you into thinking you owe them something so they make you feel obliged.

Narcissist love bombing is done with the intent of gaining control over the targeted person. They want to make their victims feel like they owe them something for getting this kind of special treatment. So in reality, being lavished with gifts from a narcissist is just another sign of love bombing to manipulate you.

They try to convince you that you’re soulmates

Narcissists are masters of manipulation and can easily convince someone that they are meant to be together. During the love bombing cycle, a narcissist will present themselves as the ideal partner. They make you believe that they have all the characteristics you dreamed of finding in a partner. 

Some other things they might say:

• “We are meant to be together.”
• “No one understands me like you do.”
• “We’re soulmates.”

You feel unbalanced and that it’s too good to be true

If you find yourself feeling uneasy, intoxicated and feeling that something is not right, it could be a sign of love bombing by a narcissist. Your gut feeling and intuition warn you that there is something not right or feels too good to be true.

Pay attention to these feelings, being attuned to your intuition can prevent you from being carried away by love bombing tactics.

How long does love bombing last?

Being in a relationship with a narcissist is full of drama and leaves you feeling mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually drained. The love bombing cycle is continuous in the relationship. Narcissists use a manipulation technique called intermittent positive reinforcement. 

This love bombing cycle keeps their victims addicted to them and under their control. Despite being abused and belittled, victims of narcissistic abuse crave signs of approval and affection from their abuser. 

The best way to be free from narcissistic abuse is to go NO CONTACT. Otherwise you keep being subject to narcissist love bombing and manipulation. If you have broken up with a narcissist, avoiding all contact will prevent you from being pulled back into the toxic relationship and falling for the love bombing tactics. 

Don’t buy into narcissist love bombing

Now you know the signs and the typical narcissist checklist! Being informed of their manipulative techniques gives you an advantage as you can spot them out.

If you are already in a relationship with a narcissist and are finding it difficult to breakup, seek support through narcissistic abuse recovery counseling. It’s not easy going against a sociopath, especially when your self-esteem has been completely destroyed by your abuser. 

Stay strong and keep in mind that the narcissist love bombing phase fades out and you enter the devaluing phase. Once you see the narcissists’ true colours, you will realize that your knight in shining armor is actually a soul sucking vampire. Learn more about ‘’What is a Narcissistic Abuse Cycle?’’ 

Love bombing is not true love. True love doesn’t take all your time and energy. A person who legitimately cares about you gives you space for growth and respects your commitments, opinions and boundaries. 

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